Peanut butter and Jess

The Latest Chapter Well I’m back. Let’s get into this fools charade shall we?  It has been a while since I have written to you. Apologies are in order. I've taken a break from working.      It has been a bit of a wild ride since then. A few months back I realized I needed a change. Clueless as to what that change would have to be, I started to analyze every aspect of my life. My job, though fulfilling, also left a bit of a void in me, kind of like Sisyphus. you do the same things, the same route to work the same walls, the same hurdles. An infinite loop, but you slowly realize it's not a loop. but a maze. A meandering maze that drives you mad with the same doors and puzzles. Life is hard but honestly it does not have to be so dead end. Go out.. Live a little. Life is too short for you to succumb to it.       Money is essential, yet when you die, you cannot take an ounce of it. We are all ashes and dust at the end of the day. I sound morbid, I know...

  Hey Sunshine! A new month is upon us and I cannot help but be filled with a sense of joy and peace. I have so many new things to talk about. I am about to get into a rage filled word vomit of all the things that have been bothering me As I sip on my hazelnut coffee and listen to Hozier I just feel the sense of clarity that makes me see things in a different light. A light that I was not able to feel or attain a few months ago but this new found clarity is intriguing. IS THIS CALLED GROWTH? IS THIS WHAT FRONTAL LOBE DEVELOPMENT FEELS LIKE? Because I love it! Ok first things first. This may or may not offend people but I live for the drama. Why are people emotionally underdeveloped? It is giving caveman brain and it is quite frustrating. You cannot physically keep calling yourself masculine/feminine without having the qualities to back it up. Some people are just so caught up with being this ‘victim’ it is so frustrating to even hold a conversation without them completely rui...

  My dearest Sunshine,      It has been a fair while since I have written to you. A lot has happened this past month. So much has changed. As we reach the end of this year, I cannot help but be filled by a sense of peace but also loneliness. I have won some, I have lost some but the journey has certainly been rewarding. Took my wins alone, swallowed my losses by myself and hey I did survive. It was a year filled with lessons on adulthood, friendship, responsibilities and growth. I have also realized I have become Carrie Bradshaw in the past weeks, where I relate to her on so many levels. Be it the writing or the incessant love for shoes and getting stuck in cycles of emotional unavailability and wasting my time. Work has been rewarding in a way that drives my ambition. Things I have taken away from these past months include: 1.     You are too much for someone. You are also just enough for someone else. You will not be enough for another person. Don’t...

  My Dearest Sunshine! It has been a month since I have written to you, how are you my dearest? How were the rains in your area? Wow time does fly huh. A lot has happened in the span of a month, I have learnt so much, gained so much, lost a bit but overall, it’s been a great month. I have learnt this month to be grateful for everything I have and cherish in life. It has been a humbling experience to take a step back and breathe and look at the bigger picture. I realized I had been stressing over all the tiny details so much that I missed what the bigger picture looked like. Work has been extremely rewarding, six months of hard work finally paid off. I was able to launch LEAD. A project that I had spent many a sleepless night over, yet it has been truly enjoyable to work with different people and bring to fruition something that was just a running idea in my mind. I feel that is the biggest lesson I have learnt, focussing on those ideas working on them putting effort and energ...

  My Dearest Sunshine, It has been a fair amount of time since I have written to you. I have dearly missed you and I really miss spending time with you. How has the weather been? The food? I hope you haven’t fallen sick this season.           What will today’s blog be about? DENTAL PAIN . Now I may sound crazy but do not let dental pain fester. Sometimes you will know that little pain in your jaw, that pull on your cheek, your shoulder aches just a bit. Dental pain sucks. Also, to note this is not about dental pain. Letting things fester does not aide in any good thing. All the nasty things find it and make it their home.           Tend to your wounds. Don’t let them sit out and fester, on the other hand don’t over medicate as well. Balance is the key. Speaking of balance off late life has been throwing me multiple curveballs on a minefield. Finding the thin line of balance in the chaos ...

  My dearest Sunshine Welcome to my 20 th letter. Thank you for sticking to this journey of mine and for reading every letter I have written to you. I am filled with gratitude for all the time you have spent listening to my rant, and I am now sending you a hug that you can catch over the web as a token of love. Today’s letter is coming from a place of deep hurt and anguish as a woman. I write from a place of privilege. A place where I grew up protected and sheltered to the evils of the world and I thank God Almighty for that protection. Only women can relate to the carnal fear that seeps through our veins when we are a bit delayed at work and we may end up going home late. Only women can relate to the shivers that go down our spine when a bike gets too close to us in public. Only women can relate to adjusting the dress that we wear a everyday a 101 times to make sure that nothing is revealing in case we are ‘asking for it’. Only women can relate to the discomfort of taking pub...